The Invasion of Hogwarts
by Gillian78
Summary: This is a spoof on all the Mary-Sued-cliched-plotbunnied-ooced-decanoned-crappola that continues to plague the Harry Potter fanfiction section on a daily basis.If you write a HP Mary-Sue, yours may end up mocked in my story...be afraid.Be very afraid.


The Invasion of Hogwart's

By: Gillian

Disclaimer: I own nothing but my speshul Mary-sue. Isn't she fabulous?

Chapter 1

She arrived at Hogwart's all the way from Los Angeles, California via her own personal carriage and merely yawned when she first laid eyes on the Scottish Castle. It was barely larger then her own home and not quite as striking. It was after all, made out of old stone rather then adobe and where were the palm trees? Didn't Scotland have palm trees? The carriage stopped in front of a large stone stair well that led to the main entrance of Hogwart's; the door opened by itself and out stepped the most exquisite creature that wood ever enter the school of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Violettia Livonia Darkraven. She walked up the stone steps, tossing her waist length hair over her shoulder. Violettia's hair was almost as black as a crow except for the striking purple highlights that shone through.

The doors opened and Violettia entered the great hall where the other students were waiting. There were many gasps and sounds of awe as the beautiful girl headed towards the sorting hat. Everyone was not only shocked by Violettia's beauty, they adored her cute outfit which was a mini-kilt, Prada boots, and a tight sweater. Violettia plopped onto the stool and one of the teachers placed the hat on her head as Violettia flashed a flirty smile at the cutest boys in the hall.

The sorting hat began to speak. "You are very beautiful and special. You have the most talent of any student here and great things will be expected. Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw will not do because all the girls in those houses are ugly and unimportant. Gryffindor will not do because all the boys are ugly and gay. No! You shall be placed in Slytherin because all of those kids are good-looking, talented, and rich like you."

Violettia stood up with a satisfied smile on her pretty, heart-shaped lips and walked over to the clapping Slytherin table. A tall, gorgeous blonde boy moved over and offered her a spot. This was after he shoved a chubbier comrade from the seat to make room.

"Ello, I'm Draco. Draco Malfoy. The Headboy of Slytherin." He gave Violettia a smug smirk that made his gray eyes seemed quite weaselish.

"Hi. I'm Violettia Darkraven from LA." The girl smiled flashing perfect, even, white, teeth. The smile made Draco feel a bit bolder.

"I must say Violettia, that you are the sexiest girl to come to Hogwart's yet and we get a lot of American transfer students." He pointed to a table of girls all with the same "uniquely colored" hair and violet eyes. Some of the girls looked related like they shared the same father, uncle, or cousin. "But since you have arrived, they are being ostracized for not being hot enough."

This made Violettia laugh. "Wow, there sure are a lot of them."

"Every year we get at least one new transfer student and they all turn out to be daughters of Snape, Voldemort, and Sirius Black. Daughters from either rape or forbidden love affairs. Voldemort has a lot of daughters." Draco told the new girl as she bit into a luscious apple.

Draco wanted to kiss those apple-juiced lips but controlled himself. Ever since he got tamed by a slew of Gryffindor love children, he wasn't so big on the out-right mean behavior and sexual escapades he was notorious for. "Over there is the Gryffindor table full of mud bloods and poor students. The only one worth the time is Hermione Granger because she is a slut. If you hurt her feelings enough, she'll cut herself just to ease the pain. I often cheat off her papers because she is the best student."

"She was the best. I have never gotten lower grades then anyone. I was the top of my class at my old school. I was sent here because our inferior American schools are not challenging enough for me."

Draco smiled widely. "Oh Granger will be slitting her wrists by Christmas then."

Violettia looked at the food in front of her and loaded her plate with 2 carrot sticks and a cob of corn. She had to watch her weight after all. Later she might binge on some dessert and throw it up. Bulimia was Violettia's only way of coping with the death of her mother and unborn baby sister.

"So Violettia, what is your wand made of?"

Violettia pulled out her wand and handed it Draco. "Phoenix feather and Raven wood."

Draco's eyes widened in appreciation. "That's really rare and proves that you must be powerful."

Violettia shrugged. "Well…I haven't lost a student's duel yet if that's what you mean."

"That's alright I suppose. Perhaps you and I should duel for fun sometime."

Violettia took a bite of her corn and twirled a finger around a lock of her gorgeous hair.

"Maybe."

All the students chatted excitedly, some yawned and groaned with Dumbledore made a speech.

The biggest noise would come though when Dumbledore announced that Pansy Parkinson was no longer Slytherin's head girl but now it was Violettia Livonia Darkraven who head the prestige.

"I can't believe this rubbish!" yelled an upset Pansy. "She has been here for five minutes and she's already stolen my position and my boyfriend! Life isn't fair!" She whined.

Violettia stood up and curtsied to the cheering student body, Draco clapping the loudest. The only ones, besides Pansy, that weren't as enthusiastic were the other American girls.

"I guess my sea-green eyes just don't compare to her lovely prism eyes." stated a solemn Glorienda Mistletoe-Black.

"My breasts aren't as perky." Said Angelica Selena Christina Lordymold, a daughter of Voldemort who had a twin sister named Ludmilla Arcadia Noelle Lordymold. They were known affectionately as Lillie and Millie and they were the perfect redheads with black highlights.

"We suck!" they all whined in unison.

The Gryffindor table was abuzz in conversation. "Oh no! Not another good student. She can't be better then me! She's can't!" cried out Hermione.

"Why does the new student have to be a girl? I hate girls." Ron muttered as he slid his hand into Harry's. "This is why I'm glad I have you Harry."

Harry nodded. "And I you Ron." He smiled and pushed his glasses back up the bridge of his nose.

Colin Creevy grabbed his camera. "I must take pictures of her for she is the most beautiful girl in school." and he ran over the Slytherine table where his camera was promptly snatched and tossed between Crabbe and Goyle while playing Colin in the Middle. "Oi you guys! Come on, give it back!" the skinny young man's efforts were futile.

Later that night, Draco and Violettia found themselves in the same bathroom.

"Say Draco babe, wanna tryout that whirlpool bath with me?" she asked with feigned sweetness and breathiness.

"You don't have to ask twice, love."

FADE TO BLACK

Stay tuned to the next chapter to see what more adventures Violettia gets into at Hogwart's.


End file.
